I know I haven't written much this year, but I am happy to say that I’m back to end this year on a good note.

My writer's block this year has been realer than real, but look who gets to have the last and final word. Ha! I had a few ideas this year and was able to execute them, which made me feel good because no matter how long it took me or the number of gaps in between, I SHOWED UP FOR ME and with life kicking my ass I needed those moments. Those moments kept me in good faith, it showed me that eventually the things that I’ve felt weren't going to last forever... but a huge part of making sure that this didn't happen in the new year was taking ACCOUNTABILITY for the things I didn't like that were happening in my life.

I wanted to leave my readers with something before this year is out. I didn't feel like I would be real, not to share what most of us are usually thinking around this time of year. Which is? Removing the people that don't add value to our lives, removing those that make us feel like we are carrying a ton on our shoulders, especially those we've kept around because we've "known them for years," it's time. What better way to wrap this decade up other than fully letting go of what isn’t right for you?

Not only will this year be over tomorrow at midnight, but a new decade will begin, and as far as the relationships that I've kept around me that weren't healthy for me just aren't making the final cut. Trust me when I say I meant what I said because it's already done. “I am already in 2020,” which is honestly the attitude and energy to have. I am going to say this louder for those in the back,

LET GO OF THOSE “LENGTHY DEAD” RELATIONSHIP THAT YOU ARE HOLDING ONTO!

Yes, finally someone had the balls to tell you. I'm checking you because I care. I want you to step into the new decade feeling like a brand new woman(man),& it has nothing to do with your home being clean or about how many grapes you ate for good luck to bring in the new year. But because you chose to let go of those lengthy dead relationships, that served zero purpose, to begin with. I want you to be the person you see yourself becoming because your surroundings allow you to shine. And no, this isn't referring to the men from my past. I am done with writing about the men that I've slept with. I am done with being Moesha & Carrie Bradshaw for now. Ha.

But anyways like I was saying… stop feeling bad for letting go of people that don't want to go where you are headed. You could read that sentence back to yourself again if you need to... There were so many moments in my life where I felt like I had to be the bigger person by addressing issues in my relationships, whether it be lovers, friends, or in my place of work. Which in most cases, I wasn't the one who was at fault. It's honestly exhausting, especially if you are the only one who's trying to fix things, and the results end in situations not changing for the better.

Again, this year wasn't the best, and I think a lot of us could agree with me on that. I had so many setbacks to the point where I would cry uncontrollably. I know everyone is reflecting on this decade by sharing their favorite moments and memes. But for me, 2019 made me fully understand Brittany Spear’s 2007 decision.. because I was so close to grabbing the damn clippers myself and not that it would’ve solved my problems but I’m pretty sure Brittany didn’t think it would’ve happen that way for her either. I just needed some sort of relief… I even questioned why were things the way they were for me, but then I realized there's something more greater waiting for me. But the real question is, am I ready?
This year I observed a lot. I did a lot of soul searching, I learned that some of my “friends” actually weren’t my friends. Not too many events I attended, I did a little traveling, I spent most of my days close to my family. Going wrong was trying to reconnect an old friendship that was already fulfilled and that's the moment that drew me to write this.

I thought this particular relationship would work because of “how long I've known this person." I figured maybe we should pick up where we left off and really give it another try and honestly "time" isn't enough to keep any relationship going. I don't care if it's with a man who you've been with for several years that you love but knows he pretends not to see you, the job you love (because of the benefits) also knowing that it's one of the critical points behind your depression or those girlfriends that aren't really your friends (tab keepers.) Sorry if you felt like I read you but please believe my intentions are good. I’m trying to free you. Think about where you are with that person, those people, or places. Do you feel like you are in the same place where you started? Are they contributors in any way? Do you feel like the same arguments keep reoccurring? Do you feel like this person is continuously throwing up past events that caused you two to part ways, to begin with? That isn't a friend. It's a downer. It sounds like someone who wants to keep reminding you of something they aren't over. It's time to let it go. Not because you are giving up, but because that relationship is truly over.

What I learned from this decade was that a lot of things can shift in your life just by removing individuals and spaces that aren’t for you. Figuring that out alone has truly been a blessing in disguise.

Know that you tried, it's done, let go, and move on. I am thankful for the people who were a season in my life, but I am okay with knowing that our relationship didn't work because it met it’s full potential.

delete those useless contacts, block those blockers, delete those receipts & be great.

I hope that all of you find the courage to LET GO, be present, and will be able to embrace 2020 with open arms of readiness because it's deserving of you!

Love you guys, Happy New Year!!

SEE YOU THERE! Feel free to like, comment, and share. XO